balance

i so often get to the end of day feeling like i didn't do what needed to be done. either i ignored my kids all day, but my house is clean, or i sewed all day and ignored both. i don't think i've ever spent a whole day ignoring everything and only playing with my kids. sad. so yesterday i tried something new for me. i started the day with one particular thing i wanted to accomplish in each of those three areas.

so i folded laundry, read books with my kids, we made cookies together, and i read my book during nap time (i did other things too. just made sure to do these). it was a good day. and i think i want to continue my effort in being mindful of these three things. i'm so often only concerned with myself.

but i was reminded yesterday, as i tried to find a solution to my often frustrating days, that i'd forgotten... rest. stillness. dependence and rest. i can accomplish nothing on my own. i so easily forget.

so here's to more rest. more dependence. the purple clouds are just now being touched by the beginnings of the day's sunlight. and i right now strive to surrender it all to my Creator. every minute... the hours... they are not my own.

the capital and my little smarty

we were in DC for the weekend. i had to be there for work and i dragged everyone with.





kate spent the day at a friend's house playing with a little girl her age (thank you felicity and isabelle!). so while i was at meetings, jason and samuel had a little day out at the capitol.



i got to meet up with them in the afternoon for a bit. and it was just such fun.





we went to the Smithsonian Museum of Natural History. and oh my. for those of you who don't know my son-- this is his heaven. he watches planet earth like it's a cartoon. loves learning about food chains and 'habitaps' (that would be habitats). a little 4 year old scientist.

he just freaked out everywhere he turned.







and then we were at the Braves/Nationals game. open air stadium with friends and ballpark food.







just the happiest of days for this little guy. and he just spreads the love. as he smiles and points, exclaims and teaches ("the T-Rex has big teeth Daddy because he eats other dinasours") you can't help but smile along.

so the next morning, we were getting ready to go.





stopped by the Jefferson on our way out of town.







we were exhausted as we took off. we definitely got our walking in. well... jason and i did.

it is such a good thing, to step out of your home and life, and just be you outside of your daily constraints. we were just us. and it felt nice. i love my little family. God is so good.



and it's good to be home. and as the rain falls today we are still settling back into our little home-space. good to be back. so good to rest together.

may your week start out with some rest as well, friends. may we all be continually resting in His provision and care.

ah rain

freshly back from a short-long trip. we are exhausted. and the rain is a glorious gift. so peaceful. nestling us back into our sweet home space. i have so many great photos from our trip. this little 4 year old was in absolute heaven visiting the Museum of Natural History. will do soon. going to rest today. and just enjoy the rain. it's been a long time coming.

the ordinary

back to life.





the (sometimes)calm and ordinary.



little ones complaining. the not-so-little ones complaining (me? never). there are innocent questions from small mouths about what it means that God knows our feelings. there are filthy floors, laundry piles and dusty corners. goodnight moon readings and curls i just can't control or get enough of.





and i'm delighted to be here. this weekend God reminded me of His patience. His forbearance. His powerful working Spirit that is changing me. i can see the difference. He IS making me more like Himself.

through less of me. less confidence in my abilities. more prayer. lots more prayer. and less control. so that i feel like i'm floating on a lake. my ears below the surface-- the surrounding sounds gurgling and unclear. surrendered to the clouds above, the creeping green on the edges. and He is just doing it around me. in and through me. without me.

i'm not sure i'm making sense, friends. but i sit here typing tonight very grateful. that He has me in His hands. that He is so very kind to me. intimately aware of my heart and slowly changing me. grateful.

change of plans

what a weekend. it started in the Tennessee mountains during a women's retreat.



some friends and i have been planning the worship for weeks now. we've practiced and prayed. I was so looking forward to time with women i have wanted to know better, times if intense worship, and some solitude in the trees with my Father.

Well He provided, but, of course, differently than i had expected. we did have an incredible time of worship on friday night. to hear 170 daughters of the King lifting their voices to Him in praise-- oh i just got chills typing it. such a special time.

however, the retreat was to be 2 days and during the first night there, we discovered bed bugs in our rooms. oh yes. you read that right. bed bugs. now, i never saw one in my bed. after hearing the news, i packed up and got outside just as fast as i could. but... it was a little freaky.

so we couldn't stay. and everyone packed up and left 24 hours early. i was so disappointed. i had wanted so badly to wander these beautiful grounds and commune with Him and my surrounding sisters.





so we had some abbreviated sessions all surrounding our beautiful gospel, had one more time of worship. and then we all split up. and instead of walking the wilderness, i was here:



uh-huh. the weaverville laundromat. with three fabulous women (and one adorable little)



we partied at the laundromat. laughed, bought plastic bags for our clean clothes to go in, tried to be quiet and inconspicuous when Beth found a bed bug on her arm (!!!). but we commisserated, listened to the live banjo music outside and ate pumpkin icecream. yum.





and i got to go back to the early girl. man i love that place. it makes me happy.





we stayed in a hotel in asheville and had a wonderful time. and as we sat enjoying our breakfast the next morning, there were pauses of silence as we thought about heading home to our little ones- the lives that daily await us. so different than our quiet breakfast.

it was a delight to spend time with my three fellow-laundresses. and it was an unexpected weekend, to say the least. refreshing in a different way and relationships were strengthened not through the long talks over hot coffee that i had envisioned. but instead over bugs, a pile of quarters and a hotel sleeper sofa.

He surprises me so often. and i'm not always good at adjusting to His plans. His good gifts are still there, but i am stubborn and unwilling to see. but He was again faithful to give. good gifts.

the results

that outdoor, wood smell. oh it's just the best. and we breathed deep. the little girl tromped right in.

and our sweet friend melanie joined us. and we got to talk in the car, and revel in the glory of the water and trees.

oh we partied it up. just the best wednesday morning i've had in awhile.

and now i'm leaving for the weekend. heading north to see some mountains and help lead some women in worship. praying for a transformational weekend. may we not stay the same.

but that means that i have to leave these little soft faces. i laid in bed with the little girl this morning and the blue dawn light was coming in the window and she giggled as she felt my eyelashes on her cheek. oh my heart is full.

my compass kid. he helped us find our way.

i will miss them so- and the man who journeys beside me so wonderfully. i'll feel a bit lost without them. but i really am excited to see the many things God will grow this weekend, in me, the women around me, and among us all.

____________

still working on getting that etsy shop all stocked. where does the time go, friends? i'm going to get there.

may your weekend be filled with what i hope mine is filled with: listening, growth, worship, quiet and jubilation.

waterfalls

the kids and i are going exploring with a special friend today. trying to discover a new waterfall. samuel has his compass around his neck already and is upset that we have to start out by driving. i'm longing to break out of these feeling-small walls today and hear those beautiful water sounds. He reminds me of His goodness through so many things, but the beauty He has created-- the greens and blues surrounding me-- is a guarantee. His creation draws me to Himself. so that i can barely breath. that feeling-- you know the one-- i can't take it all in, my breath catches and my soul is spilling. He fills it. And i can't take in all the beauty-- all the rock-water glory.

oh the fair

what a weekend. chock full of new things. new people and experiences with each blink it seemed. it was a joy.



as always, things do not go exactly how i think they will. i really hadn't understood just how small a 4 foot table could be. pretty small friends. pretty small.





but i got to meet so many wonderful people. and my visitors were so kind to stop by and compliment. i was proud of my work all splayed out and my table ended up being a safe haven in the middle of the crowds.



i am grateful that He is faithful. i was not overly anxious or distraught. He gave me peace and calm as i approached this whole new world. He reminded me of His presence and the people He so frequently loves me through. it was such a fun weekend.



i cannot tell you how exhausted i was by the end. so tired. my parents and sister were here to help (i don't know what i would have done without them). and we ended Saturday by roasting marshmellows in the tiny grill and making smores. perfect.





something samuel's been wanting to do for such a long time. it was so fun to see him delight in the process.





and erica was here. yay! she sat with me for the latter half of saturday which was so nice. what a goofy pair we sometimes make. she is lovely and was my promoter behind the table.



we ended the weekend with breakfast at Cullen's. i missed my family this weekend and it was so nice to revel in all they are for a whole day. yum.





so i'm busy now putting things on my etsy shop. i will get there. one at a time.

what a weekend. thanks for following, friends. and listening to my days. He is growing and changing me. some days it feels a little hopeless- i can't change. but He again proved Himself faithful this weekend. He calmed my spirit. gave me peace in the midst of my fear. He is faithful. even when i forget.