one stream. one direction. and revolving doors.

marriage. this rough and beautiful business of lives merging, creating one mountain stream- fluidly moving from one place to the next.

so when you look at your partner and feel so far, so unable to understand to their way of thinking... well, i can get dramatic. and 'conversation' ensues.

we stop. both looking at the ceiling as we rest our heads on pillows. we remember a bit in the silence and space who we are (children of the Father of love and peace) and who we are next to (a child precious to the Father- Who gave it all up to grasp and love him/her).

it's in the remembering that we come back. we don't always resolve. i feel like we figure less out as the weeks, months, years pass. but we come back. see each other. and the mercies are new.

we sat with a couple recently who has a couple of decades on us in the marriage department. they talked about how they still struggle to communicate- they still don't get it right. how they have to ask each other for grace and mercy. a hand extended to a knee, a glance of repentance, a small/huge request: "grace and mercy...?"

a revolving door. we will never get it all right. this must become an easier pattern for me. me doing wrong/feeling wronged-- confession/repentance-- grace and mercy.

making a home together. merging into one life. one home. warm, imperfect and awake.