a montage of what is good.

a new year. fresh starts. and as i stood tonight, weeping in worship near other wounded, dependent people, i thought of the beauty He has put into my life. i came home and looked back on this young blog-space of mine and it solidified. a testament to the good.

i'm so good at seeing the bad. i focus my heart on the things that are frightening, untrustworthy and evil. when He asks me to the opposite.

and just the discipline of DOING it tonight. of sitting and looking at the good, the trustworthy, the upright and lovely, brings my heart around. to sunlight.

a year filled with so much good. so much scary. and beautiful change that i couldn't have seen starting out. i love reflection and the clarity it brings to the days that felt muddled and messy. when i look at it all together i see: He has grown beauty. and given so many good gifts. so many moments. beauty and gifts.

right now i'm so grateful for this space. that it holds so much of my thoughts and memories. that it forces me to process all the goo inside. i'm a mess, folks. a huge mess. but He's growing beauty. oh i have such hope for this fresh month, these coming seasons. He won't stop anything good in me that He has started. and i'm so glad. and i want more. i want to understand myself- who i really am- in the shroud of His grace and acceptance. Who does He make me? how does He change me? how does the reality of His Spirit within alter everything i see, touch, and think?

so here's to the new year, friends. here's to more.