Monday, March 7, 2011

oh the lazy

i don't think i really play with my kids very often. sure, i read books. but i love books. that's easy. pretending to be a soldier... not as easy.

my sister and i both have quiet time in our homes every afternoon. the toddlers are shuffled into their rooms, the doors are closed, and there is (sometimes) quiet.

on a recent afternoon, we were talking as we prepared supper and she said her quiet time had been very unsuccessful. her sweet son kept coming out of his room, asking her to play with him. i laughed and said, "my kids never ask me to play with them. i don't think they know that's something mommies do."

so the next day, i was determined. i sat with both of them and sang songs (with motions, i'll have you know) AND did puppets.

for 15 minutes.

and oh i was so proud of myself. oh yes.

of course i interact with my kids all day, talking about things, going on walks, looping them in on what I am doing. but rarely getting on the floor with them and driving the trains around the track.

this laziness pervades too many areas of my life. so many women say things to me like, "i don't know how you get so much sewing and crafting done." easy. ignore your children and your household and you too can sew during the day.

so i'm setting a new course of self-discipline and dependence on my Provider. even the depending requires discipline-- eyes to see the gaping need.

today:
coloring
and baking
(i know. i'm easing in.)

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samuel said this was like land and water

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i refuse to let these years slip by as i seek my own pleasure. i just can't do it. and, obviously, He has so much joy waiting for me in these little hearts before me. i'm so very selfish. He is teaching me about motherhood, friends. i'm grateful, but have much to learn. but what fabulous learning material i have:

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i'm working on it.

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5 comments:

seriousbethy said...

One of my kids the other day said that grown ups don't play with little kids and it made me sort of sad, so I get you. Although my inclination is to tell you that I don't think you're lazy at all. Not when I look at all the pictures you post of you out walking with or baking with, snow angeling with, and waterfall finding with those littles of yours. Don't be too hard on yourself. Then again, I could just be saying that to make myself feel better for not playing with my kids right now, but let's not. Instead, let's pretend I'm a wise old friend that's just made you feel much better with my insight. :)

joanna said...

beth this seriously made me laugh. awesome. and you're right-- i am too hard on myself sometimes. i need a better balance. in oh so many areas.

Allie P said...

Why is this so hard?! I remember when I was a teenager babysitting and having a blast playing with the kids. When did I become such a responsible adult...one that maintains the household and rarely plays with my kids?! I think this thought often too. I have great intentions, but perhaps I'll begin with 15 min. a day. See what happens. I'm with ya on this one Jo. =)

Lacey said...

Sigh.

And let me say, "me too."

I am so glad when the kids play happily in their rooms for a while so I can "do what I would really like to do".

And then they invite me outside or ask me to be a possum or come buy a pet at the store they just created and my response is something like, "What? Are all of your stuffed animals all over the floor? You know you need to clean them up soon."

Yuck.
I wouldn't want to be my kid!

Thank you for reminding me to do better.

15 minutes is a good place to start!

joanna said...

um. please tell me, lacey, that there is a short video somewhere of you being a possum...

and allie- seriously?! why is this so hard? 15 minutes. it feels really long (how sad). but i'm trying. thanks, girls, for reminding me i'm not alone. love community.

15 minutes.