some sentiment.

we managed to catch up to some stillness this weekend.



an evening with a few friends reading some scripture and singing some carols. it was so nice.

and then some advent candles. just the four of us.





while the moments surrounding these peaceful ones are often filled with things... other than peace, we've been blessed with a few slices of quiet.

my sisters and i watched "Little Women" growing up. i haven't watched it in years. the little girl and i had a little time to myself on saturday morning. and we cuddled up and started watching. and i got all sentimental. as that beautiful music started and the snow covered trees appeared, i looked down at the girl sidled right up next to me. and you know what happened. got teary.



i'll keep my eye out for moments like these. they are here.

slow down.

i've been thinking a bit, these recent days, about a post megan wrote. i need to slow down. it's mostly my own fault. and i need to slow down some more.

i've been feeling like each day this week, i've woken up with 5 to-do items too many. there just isn't time. and then when i do tackle something, the results are... varied.

i made marmalade on wednesday that... kind of turned out. and, to bolster that gift, decided to make caramels.

well...



i overcooked them. literally took a butter knife and hammer to it yesterday. chiseled pieces off- one of which hit kate in the face after it ricocheted off the cabinet door.

yup. success all around.

and in the middle of the caramel flying and the cards being written in the middle of making lunch, how i long to be still.

how i long to sit in front of my tree with cider/tea/hot chocolate (i'll take whatever is available) and just be. just ponder the coming King.

but i keep not doing it.

He is giving me good in the midst. and i am thankful for the longing.

hoping i follow through soon.

love and incense

i sometimes have this sense that there is something inherently unacceptable about me. that i'm just a little bit too crazy to be fully and completely loved by God regardless of what i've done or will do. there is something in me- a mysterious something- that makes me just miss the bar. i have too much darkness. too much brooding. too much melancholy. or something.

but God is slowly chipping away at this lie that seems to be so firmly fixed to my heart. He is kindly, slowly, patiently, working the truth of His love and affection (yes, affection!) into my vision. He is planting it in my heart and letting it take root. 

but these lessons don't happen quickly. and on one hand, i'm so grateful. so glad i have a Father who doesn't expect me to have my life turned around as soon as He reveals a corner of darkness in my heart. He is so patient. so nice to me- to continue to repeat the same message in so many ways. through sermons, scripture, songs, conversations. i slowly end up hearing the same messages. kindness. 

on the other hand, i want change here. now. today. this instant. as soon as my eyes are a tiny bit opened to something i need so badly, i want it right now. i don't want to wait. 

it is patient and kind work He is doing, though. requiring things of me like discipline, humility and what feels like sacrifice- but ends in joy. 

two (of several) tools that have been helping me focus my heart on the utter reality of His love and care for me are these:

i'm loving this book by Elise Fizpatrick. daily (brief) readings that speak to His love for me. and all that means. they focus my eyes on the cross, not on myself. on His care for me, not my lack of care for Him. i recommend these readings to anyone wanting to be reminded (or find out for the first time) what Jesus has done, what it means, and who we are now. 

the other tool i've been using is incense. a sweet friend gave me some incense a couple of years ago as a Christmas gift. i started lighting it in the afternoons, during a particularly dark season of anxiety. i tried to use the smell of the incense to remind me of peace and hope in Christ. 

i've been lighting incense these recent days and allowing the scent and visual smoke to bring to mind the serious reality of His loving presence. right now. in my living room. He is here. loving me. 

a few days ago, i was walking from the living room into the kitchen. i had incense burning on the dining room table. and as i walked through the smoke, i found a smile on my face. my saving Jesus was there. right there. with love and acceptance. and i hadn't needed to work really hard to be sure of that.  

He is kind. so good. so patient. He is love. for me. for you. if you are in Him, He sees you as He sees His Son. unreal, friends. seriously mind-blowing.

advent wreath

oh we are certainly in the swing of this lovely season, aren't we? last year, in an effort to pay closer attention to the beauty of anticipation, we tried doing a jesse tree. yeah. we didn't really follow through so well on that one...

so this year, we're trying something new. and so far, we're keeping up.



an advent wreath. (now, obviously, we do not have a wreath. but you get the idea.) we are sitting down together as a family and, weekly, reading some scripture. we are discussing a few things and lighting a candle. or two.



i love it so far. we are using a guide provided by The Village church in texas. we are really enjoying it. i think it works for kids of multiple ages. kate is talking about the darkness becoming light. samuel is venturing into bigger ideas of sin, etc. but, as we've done these readings these past two weeks, we have had lovely moments.



the lights are all off, and suddenly, a candle brightens the dark. the darkness does not overcome it. the light wins. and we sit together and marvel at the wonder of it all.

happy advent, friends.

family/upcoming show

well hello there. we've had family in town this past weekend- such a nice visit. we went on a few adventures, made a few oh-so-delicious dinners, and had fabulous conversation in the midst.



oh- and mindy took pictures.



love..

more on that later.

my recent weeks have been filled with crafting- getting ready for a show coming up this friday.



i've been cutting and sewing up a storm over here. this friday's show will feature 8 different artists who have made a variety of ornaments. there will be ornaments made of paper, clay, fabric and even handblown eggs. (that's right).



if you have time to come out this friday night (the 7th), please do. we'll be at the Flatiron Building downtown (1211 Pendleton Street, Greenville, SC). 6-9. so many beautiful things will be there. i'd love to see you. 

christmas decor. memories. and such.

this past friday, jason made the sometimes-treacherous trek into the attic to retrieve the boxes. the Christmas boxes. full of so many beautiful things.

and i'm sure you have a similar experience at your house- you pull each item out and memories come flooding. 

i love that part of Christmas decorating. it is full of history and people. as each year passes, there is more to remember. 

we have a whole box of paper ornaments that i made the first year we were married. we didn't have money for boxes and boxes of ornaments, so i went down to a scrap-booking store and used their die-cut machine. about $3 later, boom. done. decorated tree. 

and i made this wreath that year too. no money for home decor. and so magazine strips became a wreath.

it's starting to rip and fade. it probably won't make it for many more years. but each year i pull it out, i smile and give thanks. that He gave us such good beginnings. filled with good and hard smooshed together. these little paper reminders... they are good for the soul. 

another thing i've done over the years is save pretty christmas cards. i started it as a way to gather together free Christmas decorations. i just tape them up in different spots throughout the house- mostly on doorways. 

and what started as free decor has become something i really treasure. they have ended up being little reminders of friends and family. most of whom i won't see this Christmas.

a card from a friend from years ago. i think of her every time i see it up during these lovely holidays.

a card from my sister. i always put it up in the kitchen. and, you guessed it, it reminds me of her. during Christmas cookie baking, December breakfast making, i am reminded of her. 

and it is good. people i don't get to see and who don't get to be close during this beautiful month- i'm reminded of them and they feel just a step or two closer. 

good stuff. 

thanksgiving

did you have a happy thanksgiving? i hope so. we had a fantastic one. really, truly-- lovely.



it was just us. just the four of us. we ate a huge feast together. it was wonderful.



we hadn't originally intended to be on our own for thanksgiving this year. but it just happened. and it was just what we needed.

it was a day full of zero expectations and hard work. everything was easy. after our dinner was finished, i made a cup of coffee and sat under my favorite tree in our yard. i just sat there. no book. no music. no conversation. just me, coffee, and sitting. oh, my friends, i have got to slow down more often.

and that was what jason and i kept saying all weekend. this is so nice. we need more of this. less noise, more stillness. more space to just be. i have no idea how we can do this. but it was so good to be reminded of how nice it all is. sitting under a tree and doing nothing. i'm telling you-- it's awesome.



we got down our thanksgiving tree and read all the things that had been written on the leaves. it was so good to be reminded of all the good He has given. so sweet and humbling to hear the things little hearts are grateful for.



our house is now pretty well switched over to Christmas decor. we are bedecking every surface we can find, it seems. and by 'we', we all know i mean 'me'.

happy monday, friends. welcome back.

giving thanks.

they will retell Your mighty acts...

let everyone praise His holy name forever

psalm 145

there is so much good, friends. we both know it. do we always see? most definitely not. but this week is one that He has kindly structured, in this lovely country of ours, to push us forward in thanksgiving. to retell of His mighty works. recount His deeds. tell of what He has done. all that He has given. 

riches. great riches. 

we are going to try to intentionally create some space for these kinds of things this weekend. space to tell of what He has done- all that He has given. some time as a family, as a couple, to retell of His mighty deeds. 

He has been, and will forever be,... good. 

fleeting fall

autumn is just glorious.



and every year i forget how fleeting it is.



just as i notice the tree out front is golden, the wind blows and the rain falls. i wake up to a yellow carpet on the grass.

those beauties falls so quickly.

and, of course, there is joy to be found in their falling.

(love this. apparently samuel was performing some sort of unauthorized leaf pile behavior. )

but still, the cold is breezing through more frequently these days. the limbs at the tops of the trees are getting more bare with each day. the light is coming through more crisply and unhindered. the leaves are coming down.



hope you have a pile of your own to jump into.

christmas shopping guide

6 weeks from yesterday, friends. that beautiful and magical Christmas day is right around a nearby snowy corner. to help give a kick-start to your shopping, i wanted to share some of my favorite people to buy stuff from. check out their wares- you won't be disappointed.

to start off, here's megan from this lovely cyber-spot. she is a thrift store genius who loves color and beautiful things. she upcycles and recycles. lovely stuff.





my friend, betsy, just started a little business making beautiful cedar mats. some have words and some are plain, but they are really really lovely items.





katie makes beautiful things. i don't know her. i've never actually purchased anything from her, but just look how pretty:





i bought these paper dolls for my niece a couple of years ago. you can buy them already printed or your can print them yourself. you can also sign up to have a new outfit every month sent to your email as a pdf. and there are so many beautiful options-- girls in literature (!!), fairy, princess, etc.





yellow elm is a friend from indie craft parade who makes really lovely headbands, pins, etc. so very pretty.





and just one more-- marisol spoon, another friend from indie craft parade. a fantastic couple who just had their first baby (yay!) that makes beautiful art together. she paints, he constructs and carves. so very pretty.





hope you can find some gifts here for the people you love this season. if you are reading and would like to leave a comment with a link to your favorite small-time-big-heart gift maker, please feel free.

i love the giving part of Christmas. giving gifts. what joy.



happy shopping.

snippets

this weekend was chock-full. lots of good. lots of stuff. and by sunday afternoon, i was pretty beat. i tried to take a nap, but my mind kept filling with all that was yet to be done, problems yet to be solved and lists yet to be made.

this juggle of life can be so tricky. the balance of so many areas and people- needs and wants. and as i looked through my photos to help remind myself of what our days have held lately, i smiled. there have been lots of good, sweet things in the middle of the to and fro.



this man's careful cookie making. after i told him they all needed to be made the same size, he worked so hard to make all those teeny tiny mounds even.




my favorite guy's birthday. we had banana cream pie, little voices singing 'happy birthday' and just-after-breakfast gift opening. birthday's rock.



my shopping buddies. asking for pictures and wanting to be dolphins.



me, using my phone to check my hair after i did it in the car on the way to a beautiful wedding. a fabulous wedding- full of cheers and yells of excitement and joy as the newly-joined couple walked back down that aisle.



and this crazy little miss. oh my.

happy week-start friends. i know it's crazy. i know the holidays are just beginning. may we have eyes to see the gifts right there in front of our faces.

(oh-- and come back on wednesday-- i'm putting together a small-business buying guide for Christmas gifts this year. excited about promoting a few fantastic people!)